Loney dear … ##a to ##b directions. ###

A woman reviewed my third album Sologne in early 2005 or 2006. I had already made the album Loney Noir finished. She described my works as whining and emotional-oholic. It made a deep impact to me and i felt like i was robbed on my language and emotions. What i felt was wrong, partly because i was a man.

I don’t think it hurt me in the long run, it has been a long road around all this, but i guess i’ve returned to this now. In the good way. Man (woman!) we suffer here, we are disappointed, we are sad! (!). What else could we write songs about other than the sadness and the darkness. To keep it away, to keep us sane.

i went to berlin to hear ane sing with peter gabriel. found a friend to join me and we left on a 16-hour notice after getting the guest tickets. berlin was tshirt warm, and i had such a marvellous time there. was away for something like 36 hours still so profound experience. i learned something about myself and of what i should do with my time.

have speeded up the work with the #6 record. im right in the middle of something huge, awesome and mysterious a.k.a life.

Its probably june or july 2009. Me and parts of my family have been biking around parts of a beautiful summer lake, and parts of it by cho-cho train ending up where we started.

My father and I decides to take our bikes home instead of the others taking the car. (summa: dinner upon arrival home). Dad is still stronger than me, knowing more of the trails and hills than i do. The sun is really low on the sky, just the good side of the warmness of it. I get really angry in the steep hills, on a bike from the 30′s or earlier. A part of me knows, this could be the last time in life my fathers got more strenght than me, i knew it already there. You get closer.

i was on tour with a band. we had just landed, or did i throw up the night before, after landing. i dont remember. the memory just came back, and i really enjoyed it. were probably in philadelphia, but not sure. at a radio station. it must be boston. world cafe. oscar is with us, sweet sweet oscar. stressed out bout getting malins tambourine stem, and im too hard on him. one of the greatest players i know. and best friends. im getting chili for two stairs above, getting coffee from some machine, and decides to use up the whole publicly (?) funded tape roll to turn my keyboard-box into a fake wood box. life is pretty easy, and i am happy. this must be when returning to the states second time. no, this must be the day before we started the Bird tour. Samuel connecting all his junk. Damn, i miss it now. So hard when out. I love how my brain and heart filter out. EVen considered my dark heart and mind, still i automatically filter out the good parts. this is gonna be grand.

Im doing a secret show soon. Im working out a nice solo thing. Im using old and new tecniques and im starting to feel pretty satisfied about it. A lot of things, technical, and mostly musical needs to be worked out but its starting to feel like this could be a very good thing.

Yesterday was a pretty difficult day, rhythms and variations over financial problems and solutions. Its all gonna work out, just that it gives me a stress. Im coping with it better these days than years ago, but it still haunts me, but shorter amounts of time.

So, fck crap. Lets music.

I am in a good spot. The week in Jönköping was a huge success for my personal perception of things. Artistically there is so so much that can be added, removed, tweaked and improved. I don’t know if some of you americans know what “schlager” is, but some songs with band and orchestra felt a bit like Theme from Dallas, while some of the songs with less drum kit and bigger orchestral parts felt heartfelt, good, better. The big thing for me with this week was meeting people and collaborating. Just being on a regular work place with coffee breaks and staff meetings felt like being at a place i want to be at.

Monday morning started with stating the future ideas of these orchestral maneuvres. I look forward to it greatly. As much as the chance to play more with the amazing Mattias Ståhl that joined us with his vibraphone playing. amzng!

things are moving.

Piano tremolo